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Sex with Dr. Jess


January 15, 2009

What is a Sexologist?


I’m a sexologist. I study sex: what people do and how they feel about it. It’s a tough job, but someone has got to do it.

At cocktail parties people are intrigued by my profession and I’m flooded with questions:

How did I get into sexology?

I started as a sexual health peer counsellor in undergrad and realized how much we all have to learn about sex.

Am I really into sex?

Oh yes.

Do I work with people with sexual dysfunctions?

Sometimes. But others with already-great sex lives come to sexologists for healthy enrichment strategies.

What’s it like to hear about people’s most personal secrets?

It’s fun, exciting, interesting and natural. Most importantly, it’s an ongoing learning process and I think I provide a valuable (and rare) outlet for discussing the vital subject of sex.

Does my husband know he’s a lucky guy?

Heck yeah. And I’m lucky too.

kamasBut what people really want to talk about are their own sex lives. They want reassurance that the things they do are normal. I can generally offer the universal comfort that yes – they are normal. The scope of what people do sexually is so broad that almost everything falls within the range of normal. From new acquaintances I quickly hear about open marriages, fantasies, spanking, group sex, bondage, anal play, sex work, whipping, exhibitionism and any other sexual practice you can dream up. These are all common activities and so long as they exclude manipulation and force and involve honesty, respect and equality I support the right to choose.

But what do I do as a sexologist?

I teach, counsel, consult and disseminate sex-positive information. Some of this information is health related and some of my work focuses on pleasure.

Right now I am developing experiential workshops on oral sex, manual sex and orgasm intensification that I’ll be hosting at Desire Resort and Spa in the Mayan Riviera. I am also working on a sexual health telephone information line for the city of Fort McMurray, Alberta. Other workshops/classes I host include childhood sexuality, personal sexual enrichment, sexual exercises, sex and aging and female sexual empowerment.

The roster of my workshops keeps growing and I’m loving my work in sexological consulting.

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